“The Long Hard Canvass,” a guest blog from LopsidedMom
A couple of months back, SFR reported on LopsidedMom, a New Mexican woman who had found an outlet in (and a talent for) blogging while her husband, a Naval reservist, was deployed in Iraq. The situation has changed for LM since September and the Blue Star blogger agreed to wittily update us on her story, family and Obama’s ground game with this guest blog.
THE LONG HARD CANVASS
By LopsidedMom
When my husband arrived home from Iraq three weeks ago, it quickly became obvious to me how seriously out of touch he was with the current political scene. Tina Fey as Sarah Palin? He hadn’t seen it. McCain’s multiple homes and Bill Ayers? Ehh.
And forget about pit bulls all together.
Lipstick on a pig was lost on him and ACORN was just another nut. Here, I’d waited for 14 months to get my husband back, 14 months for real adult conversation, for sparring and debating over politics and life and there I was, winning every discussion by my own landslide. Where’s the fun in that?!
So we sat down one night not too long ago and watched Frontline’s The Choice 2008. I steered him towards both candidate websites. We even had a You Tube fest with all the greatest hits. I showed him Obama’s DNC acceptance speech, the Saturday Night Live sketches and the Gibson and Couric interviews (which he made me stop because they were too painful.) And just to be fair I showed him McCain and Palin’s RNC acceptance speeches. My husband, on the other hand, showed me the sneezing panda.
But by the end of it, he was ready to go vote. For Obama.
My husband and I have always enjoyed a back and forth banter. You see, he is a long time registered Republican, you know, from way back when being one stood for fiscal responsibility and reduced government interference in our personal lives. I, on the other hand, am a true guilt-ridden-bleeding-heart –tax-and-spend Democrat (though some of the other Republicans in my family have gone so far as to call me a “spread the wealth” Socialist.)
Our casual banter became more and more strained in the lead up to his deployment. I was – and am – opposed to the Bush Administration’s policies in Iraq and he, well…he had a job to do and Shrub was his boss. For him, that was the end of the story. But for me, there was fear over raising our family by myself and resentment over my life being put on hold. There was even jealousy in a “My husband went to Iraq and all I got was this t-shirt” sort of way.
Following politics was one of the ways I kept sane in his absence (that and lots and lots of knitting) and when he returned, it was important for me to show my husband how I had been spending my time while he was away.
And so, since he is on terminal leave from active duty and essentially on paid vacation, I’ve been bribing him with croissants and coffee and dragging him out canvassing. Dragging may not be the most accurate word, but I have thrown in a little of JFK’s “ask not what your country can do for you…” to appeal to his more patriotic nature.
This morning we were nearing the end of fifth canvass together when we knocked on a door. We could hear music and laughter coming through a single pane window, so it was obvious someone was home. Eventually a slightly dazed young woman–a 20-year-old non-base voter from her profile-–came to the door and onto the porch. Another even more dazed woman followed behind her.
“Hey, you guys got a cigarette?” the second woman asked.
Really, you know it’s going to be memorable when the owner of the home is trying to bum smokes off of you. I began my spiel about getting out the vote and it became apparent that our target was not supporting Obama, but McCain instead. We thanked her for her time and began to walk away.
The smoker yelled out “Woo-hoo! Sarah Palin! Rock on!” and ran back inside.
Woo. Hoo. Sarah. Palin. Rock. On. Coming from a–and I’m going out on a limb here–most likely substance abusing and unemployed young woman.
Sarah Palin sure has the Republican base mobilized.
My husband and I crossed the street to the last home on our list. This one was a treat. There were at least 20 yard signs out front, from every party and race, the Republican signs to the right of the front door and the Dems to the left. Witty.
Turns out the guy who answered the door was none other than a candidate running for a local position on the flood control board (and no, it wasn’t Danny Hernandez or Dan Lyon). Earlier in the week we had received a flyer from him on our car windshield and were puzzled by his position statement “If I am ever convicted of a DWI, I will resign my position the same day.” Ahhh, upon meeting him, it all became clear. Turns out he parties with the girls across the street. His housemate came to the door to see what was up and proceeded to walk, shirtless, across the street to bum a cigarette.
This guy was technically a Republican, but mostly a Ron Paul fan. Not exactly a target rich environment, but hell, I went for it anyway. I introduced my husband and explained our stance, as a military family, on McCain’s horrific veterans voting record and why we are proud members of Blue Star Families for Obama. He listened (I think that’s what that look was) but said he was still deeply undecided on the national races.
I have to admit, I don’t understand the undecided vote at all. This election has eerily coincided with my husband’s deployment–the campaigns got underway nearly 20 months ago, just as his unit’s preparation was seriously intensifying. My own decision was made long, long ago and that I’ve gotten to cast my vote as my husband returns brings a sweet finality to all of this for me. To see Obama win and to watch this country head in a different direction, in some way, allows this family to turn the page and move on to the next chapter of our lives, knowing that maybe, just maybe, it’s all been worth it.
As we turned away from this last house, another young guy arrived to help the flood control candidate canvass for his own race. This kid wore a neat black polo shirt with a RNC New Mexico Delegate logo and there they were: my beard-growing (because he finally can) military husband, the local rabble rouser and Alex P. Keaton, all Republicans.
We walked back to our car and my husband confessed that he no longer recognizes his party and that he is finally ready to become an Independent. I bet with more time together, more croissants and a few more You Tube clips, I might be able to move him even further left.
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November 3rd, 2008 at 9:36 am
One of the good things that could come out of the drubbing of the Republicans is that they will return to being the party of less intrusive government and fiscal conservatism, and leave their fundamentalist handlers far, far behind. We could have used some good old fashioned fiscal conservatism in the last three decades, but Reagan put an end to that.
November 3rd, 2008 at 11:01 am
Don’t be so hard on those poor Sarah lovers! Abstinence until marriage is a tough road, one must have a vice here and there.
November 3rd, 2008 at 11:45 am
It shouldn’t be so rare to read an intelligent, REAL piece of writing about what this election really means. Most of us exist in chosen political spheres of like-minded individuals, but it would do everyone some good to get out there and mingle a little! Thanks lopsided mom, and go Obama! You have your work cut out for you.
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:04 pm
What a wonderful commentary on the current state of conservativism. I am so happy to read that your husband, who deserve nothing but honor and respect appears to see how his own party has not followed through with that promise. While there are likely democrats out there who are voting for silly reasons, it is astonishing to me how many republicans do not have the first clue about how far from the Grand Old Party they have come. Your article illustrates this beautifully. Thanks for your words and all the work that you do!
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:26 pm
Long, hard and an eyeopener to know more about who is voting and why. Your husband by your side and political reality at the forefront is a way to re-enter the U.S. Not just another country, it seems like he has traveled in time to witness the current state of affairs. Upon waking Tuesday morning, the best coffee and croissants should be available to him and perhaps he’ll get out of bed on the left side.
November 3rd, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I think that what Obama has brought out in Americans is the belief that things can change, they can get better. I see it in my Republican father, who when deciding for the first time in his life to put up a yard sign went to Obama HQ and seeing the energy and enthusiasm in the room-started tearing up.
Anyone who has been to an Obama office or a campaign rally knows this feeling. So many people, young and old, white, black, Hispanic, rich, poor working together, knowing they are making a difference.
Obama’s ability to remind us how we are connected at just the moment when others would divide us — convinced me beyond any doubt what an amazing president he will be.
Si se puede
November 3rd, 2008 at 7:54 pm
As an unemployed, shirtless, chain-smoking, substance abusing Republican woman (after all, aren’t ALL Republican women unemployed, shirtless, chain-smoking and substance abusing in addition to being stupid, shallow, redneck and racist?) I had no choice but to be a McCain-Palin supporter. Thank God, you’ve made me see the light.
Obamanos!
November 3rd, 2008 at 9:23 pm
This is exactly the kind of healing conversation that the country needs.
Get together, talk, think, share…and we will be able to solve the problems facing our nation. Thank you very much Lopsided. You and M are very lucky to have one another.
November 3rd, 2008 at 11:02 pm
…and here I was thinking that the democrats had a strangle hold on substance abuse, unemployment and the utterance of “wooo-hooo!”
November 4th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Yesterday I asked my mother, a lifelong Republican, what she thought of the state of her party. She said, flatly, “I’m disgusted.” However, she continues to vote for Republican candidates - and she’s in a swing state (VA).
Had I known you could turn ‘em, I would have sent her your way months ago
November 4th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
Here in Mexico, beyond the reach of real electricity, but with the marvel of solar to keep the Hughes satellite dish pushing and pulling those magic beams into my laptop, we all sit with bated breath, glued to our computers–our main source of NEWS . . . waiting to know who’ll be our new president. Fortunate we are to be retired and to run a tiny B&B on the white Caribbean sands, albeit with one eye and ear always listening to Mother Nature, who guides our days and nights, keeping us in balance with her, even though we SEEM to just be having fun.
The best bit of our lifestyle is to entertain guests from all over the world … which brings me to this point! We’ve heard voices from all corners of Europe, Australia, Asia and Africa …. who are in unison with the hope our country will again become a symbol of freedom and leadership–and the overwhelming consensus is that our re-birth and the renewal of hope and pride will come from Barack Obama!
And remember, it’s not that hard to return to Seattle to VOTE, as we did, so …. if Obama is not President to lead our country back to the days when our Constitution rang true and we, the people, were encouraged to rise up and govern ourselves … then, you can come live the next 4 yrs in Mexico.
Thank you, Lopsided Mom, for straddling the fence and being understanding of a husband, whose roots (probably with his parents) once embraced a Republican party which used to be made up of “proper” gentlemen and ladies–the days of my youth, the 40’s.
Your writing is balm. Keep it up and know we appreciate your words.
November 4th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Helping others to overcome apathy and embrace change and optimism is true service. Our country needs a good slug of this service these days, so thanks LM for showing us all that we can work to make change from wherever we are in life. Love to hear more from you!
November 5th, 2008 at 12:29 am
My husband is feeling a little shy about commenting. The conversation went something like this:
She says: Hey, honey, why don’t you leave a comment?!
He says: Hmmm…should I go for the loving husband thing or make a crack about the thong?
She says: Did you just say that out loud?
He says: Wow! Look at all these kind, supportive and warm words. You all rock!
She says: Yes, you all are awesome. Speaking of awesome, my father, a lifelong Republican of the fiscal conservative variety, cast his vote today. For Bob Barr. I am perfectly okay with his vote - Pres. Elect Obama rocked in Iowa and we didn’t need it anyway. I am so proud of my father for using his vote to tell the hijacked Republican party to kiss his ass.
He says: I’ve always loved your dad. Now, about that thong….
Thanks y’all. For everything.
President Obama. It’s stunning, isn’t it?
November 5th, 2008 at 6:34 pm
To comment on Jeanette Wiseman’s reply and of course, to LopsidedMom, I totally agree with them. “Anyone who has been to an Obama office or a campaign rally knows this feeling. So many people, young and old, white, black, Hispanic, rich, poor working together, knowing they are making a difference”. Yes we did! And how much more proof could you ask for?? And for the SNL skits? I just hope Tiny Fey continues with the hilarious character!